somehow, what they say is true. beginning a new chapter in your life forces you to look back.
glance over the chapters past. have you learned anything thus far in life? are you progressing? does the story make logical sense thus far? are you moving forward- no, not according to others' standards, your own. are the relationships between the many characters still at a standstill? have you mended the relationships you unknowingly and regrettably broke? is it time to move past all the drama, the issues, the arguments, the misunderstandings? is it time to stop being stubborn, and selfish, and realize that you need to accept the good with the bad?
sure. when you look over those chapters, you'd have wanted to rip some of those short stories out. you want to shred some pages, chapters even. possibly scratch out some names, dates, memories. maybe even wish that certain parts of the book were never published. but alas. it's already happened. you walk through four years of college having such thoughts. such regrets. such negative feelings of past happenings.
but yes, somehow, as that fated day in june drew closer, not much mattered anymore. the soon-to-be graduates of '09 truly forgot all the complications of the past four years, forgave the mistakes of their friends, perhaps forgave themselves, and made an honest attempt to reconcile their differences. nothing seemed to matter anymore. the truth was the same for everyone at this point: graduation is here. time for the real world. and maybe that's not such a good thing considering we're graduating at a time of economic crisis. with no jobs for new grads. with no money to support yourself by. with the dreaded feeling of having to move back home after four years of freedom and hedonism. with the realization that you're not going to see 99.5% of these people in your life ever again. until the reunion. but even so. it all ended so fast. college is now the past. can that really be?
graduation came as an excuse to see old friends. maybe even old enemies. and now that we're of legal age - most often over happy hour drinks. nonetheless, past issues resolved. we all shared the same fear of graduation, of having to look for jobs, of grad school/med school, marriage (for all the indians out there), of distancing yourself from your loved ones, of moving away from our home of four years - irvine, how we'll miss you. of reminiscing about how idiotic we were 2/3/4 years back. of how we've changed, of how we're better off/worse off, of losing all the freedom in college we once knowingly or unknowingly possessed, of all the late night starbuck runs, of the late beach nights, of the fights, of the tears, of the hugs, of the fears, of the morning watching the sun rise, of the all-nighters that never took us by surprise, of the happy hours, of may flowers. of the disneyland-palm springs-vegas-norcal visits. of the monthly dinners, of being one of those crazy sinners. of the movie/cha/gina's nights, of the octoberfest frights, of the midterms and finals, of the stress, of the lack of sleep, of the procrastinating, of all of the things that made us learn best. of the lack of ARC trips, of the indecision, of the flips. of the corona del mar runs, of the spectrum trips, of being the fashion island and southcoast misfits. of the days we took for granted, and so desperately want back, of the nights in the dorms, of those pillowfights or those boy v. girl attacks. of those nights around middle earth when no one was around, of those nights in parkwest/stanford court/dartmouth/vdc/tustin fields/burrow/funhouse/laguna beach/newport bluffs/ when fun was abound. of all the people that walked in and out of your life, of all the people that brought you happiness, and all those that brought you strife. of all the teachers that had a lasting impact on your chosen path, of all those horrible mornings when so much fury hell hath. of all the drizzly mornings in the vine, irvy, home, of all the yogurtland/sam woo and target runs, of all the turtle rock/m.e./artesia/district fun. of the dc/baltimore/ny/philly trips, of all the sactown boringness, of all the internships, of the intense experiences you've felt. of the anxiety of graduation, of the fear of procrastination, of the trials and tribulations - that made you who you are. of the laughter that made you cry, of that onion pakoda that refused to fry, of the giddyness that ensued, of those worthless boys you pursued, of the expensive clothes you bought cuz you thought they were stylish, of all the decisions you made that you refuse to believe were foolish, of all the scrubs/friends/heroes/house/ncis marathons, of those countless girls nights obsessing over hrithik/srk/saif/imran ... of the unforgettable memories and experiences in college that made you YOU, of the believe that you did your best, with regrets a few. with the belief that everything happened for a reason, that everything would get better with every passing season.
the memories are endless you do realize that. it's nearly impossible to summarize four years worth of experiences in one entry, let alone remember every single person that you had such memories with - that you still keep in touch with.
that day, that friday june 12th came faster than we expected. and in all honesty, i doubt the reality has set in just yet.
we're alumni. uci alumni.
can that really be?
here's to everything college has taught us. here's to the class of '09. congrats.
<3
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