i just wanted to be sure of you...

Piglet sidled up to Pooh from behind. "Pooh," he whispered.

"Yes, Piglet?"

"Nothing," said Piglet, taking Pooh's paw, "I just wanted to be sure of you."


its wonderful always having someone to rely on. for comfort. for a tight hug. for a smile. for a reality slap. for love. i'm one of those lucky people that happened to fall in love when i least expected it. i got into a relationship thinking i'd try it out, but who knew i'd end up with someone that was meant for me?

when i was was younger, whether with best friends or what have you, whenever i was asked what kind of guy i wanted to end up with, i always said "compassionate, sensitive and genuine." i guess someone up there heard me because that describes vishal to the t. yes yes, the same vishal whose paper i helped edit sometime back. funny how things work out huh? he developed feelings for me over the summer when i was in sacramento, and though i picked up on it, i chose to ignore it until he asked me out labor day 2009. i said no a few days later, obviously after fighting with myself about it ... but in my head i had the image of my mr. perfect, and at that point, vishal wasn't it. so, stubborn, insensitive and stupid me said no! it's a good thing he is the way he is, because he didn't let anything change between us as friends - all the time not giving up hope that i may say yes. which i did. and i'm glad i did! october 2009 i decided on a whim that i'd try it out. what's the harm in trying right? best decision ever!

turns out there is no man on this planet better suited for me than my little fobwinder. :) he's nothing i expected him to be like - and probably why i resisted so much in the beginning - but i was too blind to see the characteristics i wanted in a man staring me in the face! the first few months of our relationship, i tortured vishal to no end, probably because i myself was lost and confused about where i was in life - mentally, emotionally, physically, spiritually. i fought with him constantly and challenged him to no end. and the fact that he was able to stick through it all showed me something - that he wasn't going to leave me in a time of need. i have that hope. and though i ask him that question from time to time, i believe ... that i'll always be sure he'll be around. i had an immensely difficult time trusting him, and i had an even more difficult time getting him to express his emotions to me - see he's not like me. he's the true and exact opposite of vidya parashar. he's down to earth. he's calm. he's focused, determined, dedicated, and genuine. he has no false pretenses and he sticks to leading a dharmic life like white on rice. except he's my little brown muffin. :P

soon, with a lot - a LOT - of help from him, i realized i had to give in. i've been lucky enough to have god bless me with someone like him in my life, and i would be a complete and total fool if i let him go! so i started doing whatever was in my power to make him happy, and learn to adjust to his incredibly intense schedule. it took a lot of effort on my part, but you see, it wasn't like work. i wanted to make him happy because i had finally realized what i have in my life. everyone has fights - and we go through our share as well - but after a year of being together we decided that we'd have one night as our limit after fighting and while taking away the lessons from the fight the next day, forget about what happened or what was bluntly said during the fight itself. that has taught me, more than anything, to let go while still growing. he has taught me so much in such a short time. i honestly cannot put it into words.

to my cuddlemuffin, my babulal, my babloo, my munchkin - thank you. thank you for giving me so much and for rebuilding that trust and faith in me that i had lost. :) i needed you to know that.


“if ever there is tomorrow when we're not together... there is something you must always remember..."